Loving a monster
by KillMachine
Summary: Faberritana AU. Rachel, Quinn, Santana and Brittany are childhood friends, until Rachel left and came back 4 years later. But the trio doesn't know was Rachel has a dark secret. Serialkiller!Rachel. Warning, this will be dark as the story goes on. Contains gore.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own glee.

Unbeta'd. First fic. I just need to get this out of my head. Mistakes are mine.

* * *

10 years old.

She tried to be normal. She really did. She had the best friends in the world, for awhile, she felt like she will be better and be like just other kids, not a care in the world, playing with friends, sleepovers, but it only made her feel exhausted each time by the end of the day.

11 years old

As the days goes by, she slowly accepted that she's not like other kid, pretending to be happy, sad, and angry became a chore. If she was honest, she have never felt any of those emotions, at all.

12 years old

While playing with her best friends at the park, one of the kids tripped at the ground that left a big gash on his knees, the moment she laid eyes on the blood, she felt something. Fear? No. Its too pleasant to be fear. Disgust? not that either. Want. Thirst. Thrill. Her hearts beating so fast with excitement. The blood curve itself in her brain.

That same day, changes her life. Forever.

13 years old.

Her father got a job offer in New York. She should feel devasted, leaving her friends behind, she cares for her, she really do. Her best friends are the only people that makes her feel human. Normal.

But she thinks it might be for the better, She doesn't want them to find what kind of monster she is.

She promised them that she would be back someday, they are after all, the only ones that keeps her humanity.

* * *

New York.

Big city. People everywhere. She can feel the blood pulsating in her veins with excitement. Big city means bigger things. So many thoughts are rushing in her mind. Even for a thirteen year old, she's pretty smart, way ahead of her peers. She knows a lot of things. Her mouths watered with the thoughts of moving to bigger things. Scums scattered around the streets. Nobody would notice them gone if she _play_ with one of them. Practice. Play things. She thanks her father for enrolling her self defense classes. She could definitely use them, but first things first, she needs to learn to hide her trail. After all, she's only thirteen. She has a lot to learn. A dark smirk appears in her face.

* * *

4 years later.

Lima, Ohio.

Lima Bean.

Brittany bounces as she launch herself to the Latina giving her a chaste kiss, then moves to the smaller blonde and did the same.

''Guys! guess who just moves back!" Brittany squealed happily.

"Britt lets take an order first, I needs my coffee" The Latina moved to the counter as she ordered coffees for her girlfriends and cookies for Brittany.

Brittany was bouncing with excitement in her seats as she awaits for the Latina. Quinn was busy applying lip gloss in her lips.

"Britt baby, stay still, we're not-" Quinn said softly. But was cut off by the Latina as she slam the trays in the table, almost tipping the cups.

"San! watch it!" Quinn hissed at the Latina as she grab the hold of the cups.

The Latina just gave sweet smile and turned her heads to Brittany.

"Britt you were saying?"

"Rachel's back!" Brittany half-yelled at the duo, Quinn had the cup halfway through her lips as she froze staring at the other blonde. Santana softly put the cup back at the table. "Britt, thats not funny." Santana was expressionless, It was no secret to the trio that they have been harboring feelings for the tiny brunette. Santana being the most in love. felt her heart jumping out of her chest. The day she left was the most painful for them.

Rachel left a hole in each of the girl's heart, and they never felt complete once she left. The Quad was inseparable, but they never lost hope that one day, the tiny brunette will show up again in their life. Like she promised.

"Im not kidding Sanny, my mother saw Papa H at the grocery store yesterday. and said they we're taking a break from the big city. I wanna go visit Rachel!"

Quinn who has been silent, wiped a single tear in her eyes. She loves her girlfriends dearly, but Rachel keeps them balance when they were little. She was the missing piece in their hearts. The brunette was special in her own way. Though there were at times where she seems off but it never bothered her. "I'm with Britt, lets skip school, we'll just tell Coach we're spying on competitor" Quinn for the first time, felt her heart whole again at the thought of seeing Rachel again.

Santana smiled and already plotting ways to make Rachel theirs. The trio made a pact to make Rachel theirs when they began dating. Their relationships are known by everyone including their parents. But none of them said anything at school. Nobody crosses the trio.

None of them are aware of the roadblock ahead of them.

* * *

Putting the last item away, Rachel dropped in her bed, exhausted from redecorating her room and cleaning up. She's somewhat happy to be back.

She walked up and looked at the mirror. Chocolate brown eyes stares back at her, so lifeless that it sends chills to whoever looks at them. A twisted smile formed in her lips. The thoughts of hunting for new play thing sends chills down her spine, butterflies in her stomach, small town, means challenge. And she loves challenge. She perfected the arts of killing, leaving no trail behind. This is the perfect place to see just how far she have gone. Her thoughts we're interrupted by the sound of doorbell.

She made her way down the stairs. Looking through the peep hole, she was surprise to find three girls standing.

"Uh hi?" Rachel looked blankly at the trio wondering who these people are.

* * *

The three girls stood at the front of Rachel, wearing nothing but a black boy short, and a tank top of same color. She was even more gorgeous than they remember, her hair in its natural curl, with blonde highlights, toned legs, and abs that could cut a glass.

But her eyes. Theres something off. The trio felt like they are looking in a dead zombie eyes, with a gorgeous body of course, but dead eyes nonetheless. It made their heart clench of what could have cause this.

It was Brittany who broke the silence.

"Rae-Rae! It me Brittany, San and Lucy, well she goes by Quinn now" Brittany launch herself and engulf Rachel in a hug, who in returns, stares in shock, but realization hits her, and returned the hug.

"Wow.. I..I.. It's great to see you guys, w-would you guys like to come in?" She gestured them as she opened the door wide enough for them to get inside.

"Gots to say hobs, I'm disappointed you didn't let us know you're coming here ahead of time" The Latina huffed but with a hint of smile in her lips.

"Really Ray, you could have at least let us know you we're here the moment you step in this hell hole" Quinn playfully glared at the brunettes who had a somewhat dark smirk in her lips.

The smile bothered the trio, they don't know why but it gives them a weird feeling in their stomach, but they're just too happy to care, they feel complete again and they will do anything for the brunette. They will not let her get away this time. And nothing will stop them from loving the brunette, right?


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the review. As you can probably see, english is not my first language, there will be mistakes and some bad grammer, so just bear with me, this is my first time it to be choppy. Flashback from Rachel's first kill will come on the next few chapter.**

**I don't own glee.**

* * *

The foursome, settled on the couch busy catching up, and for the first time in 4 years Rachel felt human again. She doesn't know wether to be happy or worried. Part of her are scared to let the girls back in, she will have to deal with that later and think it over. But deep down she knows that she has to push them away if she wants to keep them safe, away from the monster within.

She can already feel the urge to kill, hands twitching. It became an addiction. She will have to make a trip out of town soon. She doesn't know how long she can control herself without killing for a long duration of time. Before she can start playing around the town, she has to apply the first rule. Know your surrounding, know the people. As much as she wants to kill the first person she can get her hands on, she needs to choose wisely. Just thinking about killing made her heart beats wildly.

She forces herself to focus on the girls. Just looking at them and being in their presence gives her a warm feeling. A completely foreign emotions. Just then, she decided she will not let anything harm her precious friends, and she will do anything to protect them, and if she herself tried to harm them, she will take matters in her own hand and kill the beast herself.

Rachel gave a genuine smile to the girls. One she only gives to her parents, and to those she cares for, which really, just her parents and the girls. "I'm really glad to see you guys again, I haven't realized how much i've missed you all till now."

* * *

The smile that Rachel gave them, made their hurts flutters.

Quinn grabbed her hand and held it firmly. "Please tell us you'll stay for good?"

Rachel stiffed a little with the contact but managed to not let it show. "If you mean for good as in the whole school year then yes, I will be attending McKinley starting next monday" Rachel managed to smile again a little strained this time.

The trio's eye lits up upon hearing that and launched themselves at the tiny brunette.

"The foursome Quad are back, McKinley wont know what'll hit them" Santana smirked, indeed. The student body fears them but with Rachel by their side, they are three times scary. After all, they learned everything from her, from icy glares, threats of bodily harms, to scheming.

"I'm really happy you're here Rae-Rae" Brittany gave her a watery smile.

"Me too Britt, how about you guys come back here later for dinner? I'm sure my Dads will be happy to see you again"

* * *

Rachel's hands started to twitch, she really needs to get out of here, she cares for her friends deeply. Human contacts makes her feel uncomfortable, it's been awhile since she let someone get this close to her. Let alone, three girls. She just needs a little air.

After saying goodbye to the three girls and a promise to come back later. She rushes to the bathroom and washes her face. Breathing in. Breathing out. A familiar beast stares back at her, with a twisted smile.

She went back to her room, preparing for her a little trip this weekend. Putting her tools, and other essentials in her bag and a diary. Her diary, sealed with a lock. Contains her darkest secret. Everything detailed start from her very first kill, she knows its reckless to keep a diary, but she just can't help it. She loves relieving every kill she makes and its the only safest way she can think of, she thought about filming but that's just way too risky. She will just have to make sure to keep the diary in the safe place.

* * *

**I know its short but updates will be frequent, at least multiple times a week. As long as ideas keeps pouring in. Sorry for the lack of dialogue. It won't always be like that, i just wanted everything out first before i start focusing on more of dialogues. Feel free to give me ideas, the more of them u give out, the frequent the updates will come. I dont have much ideas of what will happen inbetween, but i already have it planned out on what will happen when the trio finds out.**

**Any specific person for her first victim in Mckinley? It won't happen right away. Rachel will have to do a lot of planning for that as she can't just kidnap them, and kill without causing a ruckus around the town.**

**Again sorry for mistakes.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for follows and reviews.**

**Rachel will not kill any innocent people, only those who doesn't deserve to live, in her own views. I dont plan on getting the Unholy Trinity gets hurt or anything like that, they will be part of Rachel's dark secret but I'm not too sure, if A. Should they help her and find a different way to deal with her urges? stop all the killing? or B. Try and help her by choosing victims,clean up, but will not be joining, they will stay out of her way when she's doing her own thing. Let me know! Thanks. and PS. Please dont look for realism, just get on with it :p**

**I don't own glee.**

* * *

_14 years old._

_Flashback_

_She finally found a perfect a target. Months of planning and plotting, and the day has finally come. She did a lot of researching and learning from the best. Her mentor. It was a brief meeting. 2 weeks at most but he taught and gave her everything she needed to learn and what to do. He saw through her mask, and vice versa. It's funny how monsters can easily recognized one of their kind. But enough about her mentor, we will get to that later._

_Her target. a homeless, who will do anything to get money and use it for drugs. She despise scums like him. She double checked all her tools, her dads worked at one of the hospitals, She easily snuck in some of sedatives tranquilizer, that she places in her back pocket._

_She strapped her bag in her back and rode her bike, on the way to the abandoned building. _

_As she made her way inside, she drops her bag on the floor, to get everything she needed. She prepared everything just the way she was taught._

_A chair sitting in the middle. with plastics wraps surrounding the area. And a single lightbulb in the center. This might be her first time, but she will not be sloppy, she is Rachel Berry after all. She doesn't do things half assed. Always aim for the perfection. _

_Let the games begin._

* * *

Present time.

After taking shower, and getting dress, Rachel made her way down stairs, seeing her dads cooking. She had told them that Britt, San and Quinn will be coming over for dinner right when got back from store.

"Smells good pops" Rachel made her way to her father and plops down on one of the chair as she watches her parents cooks.

"Rachel baby, why don't you make yourself useful and chop the carrots" Hiram motioned the brunette at the side of the table with the vegetables.

"Sure Daddy" Rachel made her way and grabbed the knife, and started cutting.

"Baby girl, why don't you tell the girls later to invite their parents next time? It'll be nice to catch up, I heard from Mrs. Pierce that the three girls are in unusual relationship, do you happen to know anything about that?" Leroy asked.

Rachel accidentally cut her finger from hearing what her fathers just said. "W-what are you talking about?" Rachel who seemed unaffected by the cut, looked at her father with shocked in her eyes.

"Oh i take it they didn't mention it to you earlier?"

"No.. they just-" Rachel cut herself off as she finally took notice of the blood in her fingers. She felt her hearts beating out of her chest, attempting to control herself.

"Rachel!" Leroy yelped as he went and grab Rachel's hand in the sink to wash off the blood.

"Hunny please grab the first aid kit" Leroy asked Hiram who rushed in the bathroom to grab the kit.

"Oh god, oh god, we need to bring you tomorrow at the hospital to get this check, you might get infection" Leroy rambled on.

"Dad please stop being a drama Queen, its only a little cut" Rachel plastered a quick assuring smile at her father. Though insides, she's trying really hard to even out her breathing, her urges wanting to get out. Just few more days, she tells herself. Control. She needs to be in control. She cant risk losing herself. Specially in front of her parents.

Once her finger was taken care of, her father sent her upstairs to finish up the dinner.

She looked around her room. Dark red walls. A New York Time Square poster. Few movie posters. A film reel replica attached on her wall. Flat screen tv in front of the the bed, set against the wall. A study table in the corner of her room with her laptop. Its just like her room in New York,but bigger. She closes her eyes for a moment and started thinking about the girls, who she just learned are in polyamorous relationship. She honestly dont know what to think of that. In all her 17 years of life, She has never felt attraction to anybody, _Yet._ She won't deny that the girls grew up to be beautiful,but then, last time she saw before they moved in to NY, they we're already shaping up, curves and chest, already showing in their body while she remains the same. She admits she matured rather, slowly. It wasn't until a year later that she started to show.

A smile makes it way on her face as she started thinking about the girls again, Brittany's innocence and bubbly personality, others may think she's just another dumb blonde, but what they dont know is, she's a cunning little one. Santana, her soft raven hair, and exotic face, she sure is one of the gorgeous girl she've seen. Feisty and protective. She doesn't beat around the bush and goes straight to the point. People knows she's a bitch but she's one of the honest person she knows. And Lastly, Quinn, with angel like face but can easily transform to a face even a demon will fear. She knows what she wants, and what she wants, she usually gets. All three girls has their own unique personality traits that she admires. Growing up with them, they became a big part of her life, without them, she knows she will be one of the mindless monsters walking around, without a care in the world, and that will surely leads to an early, worthless death. Or worse. Locked up. She will do everything she can to keep them away from her darkness that's within her, but without pushing them away. She needs them to keep her grounded. She might view herself as a monster, but she wants to keep her humanity, even just a little. And maybe some day, she can lock the monster inside her. Someday.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of doorbell. She made her way in the bathroom, and looked in the mirror. A ritual that she's gotten used to. A rehearsed smile appeared in her face. _Showtime. _Control. Breathe In. Breathe out. Time to see my girls. This time, a genuine smile play itself on her face.

* * *

Sorry about the cut on flashback. It will be bits by bits.

Any guesses on her mentor?

Rachel won't be a complete emotionless in this. Well she will only feel emotions with her parents and the girls. But other than that. She wont give a Fu-.

I usually write around 1am, so count this as half asleep writing,some part maybe confusing, I will correct them when i get the time. I have a job and work on swing shift, so I'll write whenever im close to sleeping probably 1 am to 3 am.

Feel free to ask questions, and suggest stuff. really need more ideas. If things goes according to plan, this will expand all the way up from college life to their career life.

Nighty-O!


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry got busy with work. It's 1am in the morning right now, but i will force this one out for a short update**

**Here's the continuation of the flashback from last chapter.**

**Warning. a little dark. just a little?**

**Mistakes are mine, **

**Glee is not mine :[**

* * *

_Flashback_

_She managed to lure her victim in the empty building. It was too easy. The mention of good deals for drugs had him rushing to the destination. And the moment he entered, she didn't waste time drugging him. Ha. guess there is a drug for him after all. _

_After setting everything up, she had im tied up in the chair,naked, with tape on his mouth. She doubled checked everything, she cant afford making mistake. _

_She was dressed in simple black trouser, blood red long sleeve shirt, and black combat boots. She lights up few candles in the room. With her victim starting to wake up, she puts on her phantom mask, and went to the table, turning the music on. _

_The Phantom of the Opera intro filled up the entire room._

_A dark twisted smile played itself on her lips, loosing herself in the music. Her hearts beats wildly with the excitement of what to come. _

_After grabbing the long-reach butane lighter, and a bottle of gas on her bag. She walked slowly to her prey, the scream of her victim, unheard of, by the gag, and by the loud music filling up the room. She set the lighter on the table near the chair, and poured the gas on half the face of her victim. Tears wells up on his eyes, his attempt of screaming and moving, are in vain._

Sing once again with me  
Our strange duet  
My power over you  
Grows stronger yet  
And though you turn from me  
To glance behind  
The Phantom Of The Opera is there  
Inside your mind

_As a cue, she removed the tape on his mouth, lit up the lighter and brought it on his face. He didn't had a chance to react as half his face was set on fire. A complete euphoria took over her body as his scream overlapping with the song filled up room._

_She didn't wait that long to set the fire off, not wanting to completely burn his face. She took one last look at her work, his victim openly crying and panting, almost to the point of passing out. '' If you pass out, i will pour salt on your face'' she quietly whispered on his ears. _

_''Why are you doing this! You fucking bitch, I will kill you when i get out of here! I will fuc-'' She cut him off and taped his mouth again._

_The look on her face sent chills down his spine, and he knew by then that he will die. _

_She went back to the table, grabbed another phantom mask to put on his victim. _

_A new song starts to play._

Night time sharpens,

heightens each sensation

Darkness stirs and wakes imagination

Silently the senses abandon their defenses

_She grabbed a long knife, stalked her prey. As she circled around him, she hums the song under her breathe, as she slash the knife on his chest, but not deep enough. Another slash on his thighs, arms, more on chest, and soon enough, he was bleeding all over. The blood all over his body sent her to another euphoric state, she wanted to do more, so many unthinkable thoughts swimming through her head. But she knew she has to end this soon, she has little time. She took out the mini saw from her a bag, a farewell gift from her mentor. She looked at his victim, happy to see there's still sign of life, she wanted him to feel her cut through his bones before he die. She literally skipped her way to him, with a gleeful smile on her face. _

* * *

_After discarding the body parts in the trash bag, she sent a text to a number that her mentor gave to her, someone who can get rid of the body. She's still too young, after all to be able to rid of the body, she made a mental note send a thank you to his mentor when he contacts her again._

_ When she got home, she's still in euphoric state, she grabbed a diary that she bought, unlocked it and started writing. Everything is still fresh in her mind. The scream, the blood, the sound of the bones agains't the saw._

_Oh god, she needed more. She started planning out on what to do with her next victim._

_End of flashback_

* * *

**No UT this time, but there will be full of them in the next chapter, and I promise it will be a long chapter**

**Idk when i will update though, hopefully next week before the end of the week.**

**I know the killing scene sucks, it sounded better in my head but once i wrote it down, blah. Hate it.**

**Anyways its her first kill, so.. thats why it kinda sucks? I'm not sure if you guys wants more details, or less detail, i wouldn't want it get deleted cos of that or somethin.**

**Still deciding wether the UT will help Rachel find alternate way or help her with the victim choice.**

**It's all up to you guys.. **

**Suggestions are welcome.**


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